Being of Value to God

I am so grateful for all the changes that have come from my being a member of this church and learning Christian Science here.

For various reasons, which at one time seemed significant, I left my youth feeling like I was completely worthless, and that my only real value came from my being useful to others. Each time other people decided I wasn't worth keeping around, it once more validated those old feelings.

When I finally arrived here in Plainfield, I began learning from my practitioner that my focus should be on God alone, and that only He can make me useful. However, for the first 8 years or so of being here, I still couldn't let go of the feeling that even the slightest drop in my output would show that I don't have enough value to keep around. It wasn't until I saw others come to Plainfield and saw them working through similar feelings that I realized no one here is expecting that behavior of me or anyone. Again, it is God alone who makes us useful.

So, in the wake of that realization, has come a few years of steadily learning to trust God more and to humanly push less, and to learn to be kinder to myself and give my past to God more. What a wonderful blessing it has been to learn these lessons and to feel God’s love and to let that old man go. I am so grateful for this church and for my practitioner for everything I have been taught here.